Ever had one of those days where your body is at work, yet your mind is elsewhere? Of course! Right? We all have those days and sometimes we have them several times a week!
Just so happens today was that day for me and it was a weeks worth of days rolled into one. I'm feeling just plain drained at the moment as it seems as if I've been on an emotional roller coaster all day.
Even as I type, the coaster continues as I anxiously check my phone for word from Adam, my friend Whitney's husband, with an update as to how she is progressing and if their precious little one has made it into this world yet...can't wait to meet her! I know they will make wonderful, loving and fun parents!
Rewind back to early this morning, crazy traffic, running late to work, radio playing in the background. I pull up to a red light and am reminded by the ever so helpful Facebook of a birthday of a long lived yet missing friendship. Its days like today in which I would normally take comfort in our friendship knowing that I could confide in her and that she would inevitably be able to cheer me up. Instead, I reminisce of our past friendship and wonder if we'll ever be able to get that back as so much has happened between now and then.
Once to work, I find it difficult to concentrate as my mind wanders during my fourth day of training. I was just recently promoted and will be starting my new position on September 1st. So much new stress, so much to learn, so much to see, so much to do and practice...too bad we can't telepathically transfer all that information from her brain to mine...it sure would make things a lot easier. Lol.
My mind drifts to fellow IF's, former co-workers, friends, a sweet couple whom I have a heavy heart. Infertility is a lonely disease and I find comfort in their encouraging words, wisdom and strength. As I know they too have fought this unfair disease and won! I pray for comfort and healing for them as she has been in a medically induced coma for more than a week after undergoing an emergency cesarean section. My heart breaks more for her each day she remains sedated and unable to hold her precious child, as I know how hard she fought, how much she's endured, how many up's and down's she struggled through in order to have those first few hours, days, weeks, those priceless moments of motherhood.
I've shed more tears than I would like to admit today. Candice had the pleasure of witnessing one of my moments and so kindly offered to give me an after breakdown hug if needed even at the risk of going over her allotted lunch break time...haha!
My mom called late in the afternoon to share news of another great blessing headed our way. She meet up with a family member whom unknown to us had struggled with infertility herself and graciously gave a $100 donation to go towards our IVF Fund with only a mere dozen cookies in return. I am so overwhelmed with emotions and so grateful to her as well. My heart is full of cheer and I only hope that once day I can pay forward the kindness she has shown to us. Thank you so much.
Well, for now the roller coaster has ended. Until next time.
Amy :)
No comments:
Post a Comment